Choose and Experience Happiness Every Day – Starting Today on Positive Thinking Day

In the workshops I do, whether we are discussing a life well-lived, a job well-done, a great relationship, a corporate culture, or a well-executed strategy, when we ask what is the essence of what we truly want, the answer is always happiness.

To me, there are two kinds of happiness – emotional happiness and true happiness.

Emotional happiness is momentary. Fleeting. It doesn’t last and attachment to emotional happiness eventually results in its opposite—sadness. True happiness, on the other hand, just is. It remains steadfast no matter what happens.

Emotional happiness changes according to my mood and depends upon my interpretations of and reactions to external circumstances and the behavior of other people. True happiness is a state of well-being and contentment that remains unchanged by external circumstances.

True happiness begins with self-awareness. Learning what brings about true happiness takes self-awareness. Being true to who I am, choosing thoughts rooted in love vs. fear, takes self-awareness.

Self-awareness involves looking at our thoughts, noticing the thoughts that are presented to us by our brains, creating a pause to add light, and choosing thoughts that are in alignment with who I am and who I aspire to be in this moment.

Most of us have not thought about our thoughts. I know I didn’t. Before I started practicing self-awareness and managing my thoughts, I had no idea what I was thinking. I was not aware of the thousands of choices and decisions I was making each day that were not serving my purpose and moving me away from experiencing true happiness.

When I started looking at my thoughts, I became aware of the power of thought—aware that each thought either leads me to true happiness or it doesn’t. And I could practice choosing thoughts that make me truly happy – that are in alignment with who I am and who I aspire to be.

When we, as individuals and organizations, are being true to ourselves, living our truth, that truth offers more happiness and love of our selves and others than we can imagine. Our souls sing. We are inspired and impactful in all we do. We achieve significant results and long-lasting success.

And the ripple effect is of considerable magnitude. Ghandi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” Let’s be truly happy, content, at peace. Let’s make that difference.

©2010 Managing Thought. All rights reserved.

For more on this topic and how to manage your thoughts in everyday circumstances and how to deal with the challenges you face in practicing self-awareness and being on purpose, Click Here.

The Ultimate Resolution – Peace, Happiness, and Making a Difference

Mark Twain said, “Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.”

For many of us, it seems that no matter how motivated by our resolutions, we go back to the way we were. We say life happens, we don’t have will power, or we lack discipline. Thankfully, these are NOT the reasons our resolutions don’t work. The difficulty lies in the process. Feel free to check out my Forward Thinking™ reminder, Keeping Resolutions, for specific guidance on how to reframe your resolutions to achieve long-lasting success.

For now, let’s get to the heart of matter: What do I really want to resolve? And how do I achieve it?

In my experience, it doesn’t matter who you are, how old you are, or what you do for a living, at the very essence, we all want the same thing—to be happy, at peace, and of service (to make a difference.)

If we get to the essence of any resolution, whether it be to lose weight, quit smoking, reduce stress, exercise more, get balance, or be more present, we discover that the essence of what we want, what we are resolving, is to be happy, at peace, and of service (to make a difference.)

So let’s start there. At the essence. Let’s ring out the old, and ring in the new. Let’s ring in peace, happiness, and making a difference.

How? With a single step in self-awareness: Noticing Need to, Have to, Should, and Must thoughts and replacing them with powerful thoughts.

Need to, Have to, Should, and Must thoughts suck the life out of us. They work against us in so many ways. They bring about force, criticism, blame, judgment, frustration, anxiety, and worry. They deplete our energy. They bring about attachment to one outcome. They block our ability to discover the reality we are choosing and to experience the joy of being on purpose or to discover we are not being true to ourselves. They prevent us from making a difference or seeing that we are making a difference. They close the door to our highest awareness and creativity. They do not inspire.

So the next time you catch yourself thinking or saying, Need to, Have to, Should, and Must, simply observe it, without blame or judgment, and do a do-over. Repeat whatever you just thought or said, replacing the Need to, Have to, Should, or Must with a powerful thought.

We have a buffet of powerful thoughts from which to choose (I love buffets!):

• I choose


• I am committed to


• I am thankful that


• I wonder how I could


• It would be great if


• I wonder what’s possible


• It’s important to me that

It’s key to do the do-over. You are giving your brain a new script. And the more often your brain rehearses these new thoughts, the sooner your brain starts presenting you with them automatically.

We all have different styles. See which thoughts feel right to you. One thought may feel powerful in one circumstance, and a different thought feels powerful in another. This is what self-awareness is all about. Noticing your thoughts and feelings and choosing thoughts that serve your purpose.

I invite you to try it. Ring out the old. Ring in the new. See what happens.

The ripple effect is of considerable magnitude.


PS If you want to measure the impact of putting your resolution into practice, feel free to take the How Do Your Thoughts Rule Your World?™ self-assessment, save your results, and take it again in four to six weeks to see the difference.


©2009 Managing Thought. All rights reserved.

For more on this topic and how to manage your thoughts in everyday circumstances and how to deal with the challenges you face in practicing self-awareness and being on purpose, Click Here.

Holiday Stress Management: How to Reduce Stress and Experience Peace of Mind this Season

With holiday plays and parties to attend, cards to mail, gifts to buy, baking to do, guests to prepare for, and a slashed budget to boot, you may find yourself tied up in ribbons. Yet focusing on the essence of what you want is one of the most powerful ways of thinking to reduce stress and bring about peace and happiness during the holidays.

During these stressful times, we may find ourselves consumed with thoughts of worry, self-criticism, frustration, and even anger. Thinking about the essence of what we want, on the other hand, raises us to a new level of consciousness, gives us the ability to discover what truly matters to us, receive ideas on what to do next, and experience peace and happiness.

Here are some practices to help you discover the essence of what you want:

• Stop thinking, “I have to,” “I need to” or “I should” thoughts. As soon as you catch yourself thinking one of these judgmental – and exhausting – thoughts, restate your thoughts using the words, “I choose,” “I am committed to,” “It would be great if” or “I wonder how I can” and notice what happens. These powerful thoughts help us relax, discover what we really want and open us to the many ideas on how to achieve it.



• List everything you think you want to accomplish during the holidays, and ask yourself, “What does this bring me?” for each item. Keep asking and answering the question “What does this bring me?” until you get to the essence of what you want. If the essence of what we want brings us peace or inspires us, we open ourselves to the myriad of possibilities on how to fulfill what we truly want. If the essence does not bring us peace, then we can cross the item off our list or choose another way to think about it.



• Take a deep breath focusing on the exhale and think “I wonder what truly matters in this moment?” Reinvoking the state of wonder is a sure-fire way to reduce stress, spark creativity, and keep us fully present and focused on what really brings us peace and joy.

©2009 Managing Thought. All rights reserved.

For more on this topic and how to manage your thoughts in everyday circumstances and how to deal with the challenges you face in practicing self-awareness and being on purpose, Click Here.